Radiation Will Be The Judge To Which You Will Testify

Posts tagged “hatred

The Taste of Rage

I awake, reality institutes deceptive assault
daring me to stoke the flames,
staring at me begging for coal
daring me to fuel the fire

Reality spit at my face,
haphazard, decrepit strategy
as I tried to ignore the putrid stench

The world awoke, raining frozen hydrogen from above
enclosing the sun in cumulonimbus gloves,
foolish trick masquerading as a dove

Duality lit totality ablaze
Forever gazing through absent haze
Pleasure hazing monastic graves

Spastic legs, I walk, misconstrued
plastic dregs talk, confused
harassing pegs, they overlooked bombs’ fuse

Today, silence resounding calms
no vibrations from violent pounding palms
tomorrow more journey for floundering prawn

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Day 3/Heartburn Reloaded

This is day 3, and while I have regained lost mental acuity, and calm
I have undergone the recurring problem of doubt, and hatred

She no longer gives thought, to my trials
She no longer cares, about my plight
Whether she ever did before, irrelevant
For the facts must be dealt with now

She said she was trying to stop talking,
while she talked more, like always
And claimed I was writing her novels

Here is my next novel to you, I call it: Brick Wall

For now that is what composes my heart,
my eyes wear blinders, where only your visage is absent
and the whole colorful world envelopes your empty space

I am a brick wall now, that you might forever regret
using your double-edged tongue to cut me lengthwise
and test my patience

How does it feel, running your hands along this mortar, where
my mouth once existed
do not you wish you could grasp the slender handle of a sledge hammer
break apart these walls, which your contemptuous hands dreamt of building
Now you may grumble in your own hostilities, loathing my attitude
Like I loathe your contemptuous being

Can you hear? The echoes?
Bouncing off my brick wall
Thank you for helping to build it


Distorted Torsion

What recourse remains,
for a lover, long forgotten
shadowed in the subterranean

And what meaning,
does this dream hold?
A woman opening her arms
shooting warmth from her genetic pillars of ecstasy
refuting my girlfriends hoarse screams of contempt
your insulting tongue can cut no longer

Two weeks ago, you hid a blade in plain sight,
and attempted to shred my confidence, ruthless and sour
But I know inside your ego’s devoured

So while waking, conscious life colors this world in sunlight,
I bide my time, for another chance at real affection
From strange women in strange dreams,
making my brain scream to escape you,
and your vile, acidic words

I am approaching break point, and she refuses to stop this onslaught

Before, it might have been,
but now it will never be bittersweet,
when i escape your shackles


Travel Battles

Along this path, battles travel
wrath rattles, let fall the gavel
chest falls, staff afraid of errant disaster
subterranean plaster covers feral masters
as terror passes, scowls and glares from pastures
my mind so impaired they cannot modify my stature 
now is time to codify my capture
before all my sins mollify rapture
appalled tribes angry as i stall for time
you call it hesitation i call it crime 
miserable commiseration follows,
delirious nation thinks this call rings hollow
but if all this is mine, fists weapons and the divine
my mouth will lead to spitting truth on primetime 
enact devastation for small minds
exact pleasure awaits like slime on vines
evolution declines to daikons shrine
i might sing songs as a result of spite, 
dissent cake i took a bite hand slighted in blighted squalor 
man eat man as we fight over dollars
worthless paper like golfcourses swallowing every acre
my prides forsaken, left in a gutter to perish
melt like butter, make buttars stutter is what i cherish
step on my toes ill give your nose more holes
mere trolls, sleeping giants better consume your nodoz
or stay in the shackles


Deficits

This path has become hinderance,
annoying in its futile persistence 
stomping ground, stomping ground
I am lost, maybe I don’t want to be found

An instinctual, innate rage believes its all my fault,
and it probably is…
only my perception of the illusion of reality
which has faded like an old textbook, forever forgotten in a field
which has, jaded me in a darkness that only begs for sunset
each voice attempts to drown out the silence and fails
if only because my brain refuses it passage

Every single thread of my genetic adventure is coming unravelled,
moving an inch seems too much travel
putting up with grinch just to experience the gallant
but her happiness was just a slick talent,
a sick talon slicing, skin torn
sick of the sounds, aural costs too priceless
when I first opened my mind, sin was born

And now it won’t close
And now they won’t stop
And now I won’t bear prose for naught

so caught, the sun god is so hot
wilting my skin as one of gods forgotten crops

lost with no one as savior


A different form of acid reflux

Happiness dashed,
as these walls crumble
each flake of mortar fulfills function
slashing my carotid arteries
assaulting contentment

Formerly escaped..
..vaulted disorder
halted apprehensive infringement
desecrating perimeters
it smashed through and got the wound salted

The high swoon, hoping esteem dies soon
engaging my typhoon, a mind-storm
belied by a pride no longer in swine form
or is it? H1Nspun, viral mystics
surrounded in a theater of critics
fear hounds while jeers drown
tries to cheer
deaf to its sounds
stress pounds, cardiac absence
fleeting into safer corners
this party is wack, dashed hopes again in the labyrinth

Now it will not rest
flounder in lost threats
the Reserve where hidden costs are kept

Now driven by cold, the frost crept
word weapons, hostile tools accost in one breath
soon neurotransmitters blast hazards at the bureau of critters
thorough blizzard scorn
cannot heal blisters from the storm


Heartburn

When she finally decides to throw me against a putrid gutter
I will have reaped what has been coming for years
Never did I feel that it belonged, two different puzzle pieces,
one, with razor sharp edges, which intersected and interjected the other, round and dull

My point of view barely extends beyond this second,
infinitely immersed in the only present visible
and all I can see is myself
cowering in a dark corner, where light cannot shower its contempt

I dive into a pool of my own thoughts, as always
remembering this was meant to be
I never deserved half an hour, much less a year
and now my faith dangles from the edge
and now my hatred spills across the floor into its own pool
forming my being

Soon, possibly sooner, I will finally reach that point,
where I always belonged, how it was always supposed to happen
sitting, again, alone, raped by my own self-composed silence
saturation in tacit lonliness
vapid voids which escape this
screaming defiance of truth

How much longer will this decrepit charade remain,
ignoring her heart and soul,
trying to exterminate my own in the process
leaving us both shattered

then, will I know true pain