Radiation Will Be The Judge To Which You Will Testify

Letting Go

This constantly recurring dreamstate, I tire of its existence
After appearing for prime-time viewership,
Shining lights overhead, make-up artists zipping toward your face
Creating between you and I, an ever increasing distance

As if this wasn’t discussed, 5o times in the past,
As if I cared, where you play your games
Or into whose eyes you blindly stare

Just like when your shoulder turned for the final time
handing me a measly piece of paper,  pink slip disguised as a love letter
And walked away

Maybe this really has, eaten away at my soul,
torn at the fibers of my wavelength
attempting to change its frequency

That is why this must be done, that is why
thoughts of you are rusted, I bet you must be stunned,
I won’t cry if you don’t belie
the reason I wasn’t,
some sick game to save your pride

And now the finality of it all, bidding you one last farewell,
thinking back to the one second I held your hand, gazed into your eyes,
and those beautiful lies you told

Goodbye to you, blonde with the bright hair, and not-so-bright mental state
With the ancient father who fell down the stairs,
With the older mother who hated, when your religion was reduced
to laying with men, your body bare

You have lost any ability to seduce, you cannot even, invade my dreams
parade your body’s gleam,
wishing me to fall for your degraded schemes

My feeling for you has long since expired, and now
I willingly relinquish any future rights to that status,
Before I was so blind, to viewing the truth,
Thank heavens that I finally grasped reality’s meaning

My true love towers over you, surpasses your disgraceful abatement of feeling
Her keratin may not color like yours; all for the better
The aura shimmering from her has blinded me for seven years,
And I beg for more

The most self-respecting Woman I have ever come into contact with,
Does not fear light shining upon her face unhindered,
She does not cower from herself, like you
And up until now, she would never cross me
And even if she crossed me and walked out tomorrow, never
again to speak my name, never again to gaze into my heart,
I would have more respect for her

I have not deserved her, or happiness, and they both remain, fortified, entrenched
Never afraid to look truth in the face,
Spit at the fake
And walk away from your utter contempt

As far as I am concerned, you have lost, I have won
And as I let you go forever, accepting the past as nothing but
a movie reel, dusty and locked in a basement since the 20th century, forgotten,
irrelevant and useless
As my hand releases for eternity, your chances of existing in my reality,
I feel no pain, hate or sadness.
I am content, ecstatic and calm.

As my beautiful soulmate takes my palm, you can consider my heart….
….-Forever Gone-


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